Keep Love In Your Heart
by darkestangel1326
Summary: In an alternate universe, where FTi held no memory of a passionate kiss, and The Jungle Movie also had no kiss, what would happen to Arnold and Helga? How will that change their lives as adults? Read and Find Out!
1. Alpha and Omega

**A/N: HELLO EVERYONE! Wow so this is weird for me. This is my first ever prose chapter story. So I'm nervous. REALLY nervous. Anyway, this is a little idea that popped into my head. And the idea kind of…mutated. It was fairly simple idea, and I was like "that would be cool to read" and after I said those words, I was DOOMED. XD. I kept making a plot, developing it, then I just wrote down the summary of this story on a Word Document. And now, HERE I AM, presenting the first of many chapters. XD**

**OK, enough of my stupid banter! Let's get on with some main points of this story.**

**The FTI kiss does not exist. Here, Helga still helps Arnold and Gerald, but as herself. She'll get angry at Bob so she'll help Arnold and Gerald but still through phone calls. He finds her at the rooftop but instead of her telling him about her love she says "Football Head, take your sweet time why don't ya? It's not like the neighborhood's going to be torn down in twenty minutes. OH WAIT!" He'll snap out of his questioning tone and be like "You're right. C'mon. Let's roll" and the end is the same except for the awkward "it was just heat of the moment" conversation.**

**The Jungle Movie DOES Happen here. But here's what happens: well from my interpretation of TJM, I get the feel that Arnold and Helga get separated from the class and they find Arnold's parents and fight La Sombra. Well, in this universe, Gerald and Phoebe get separated from everyone because Olga keeps Helga in her sight at all times, and people keep seeing Arnold wander off and join him. So Gerald, wanting to help his best friend, looks around the jungle aimlessly (he doesn't have the map) and eventually finds Arnold's parents. Phoebe follows him, using her smarts to say something like "there's fresh water this way." Or something along those lines. Anyway, they free Arnold's parents. Arnold's parents grab La Corazon and run meanwhile Gerald and Phoebe are already running. They fall into a trap hole and are stuck. They talk, confess they "like-like" each other and kiss. Then they hear "Phoebe! I finally-EWWWWWW! PHOEBE!" And Phoebe and Gerald look at Helga sheepishly and Phoebe says "HELGA! I WAS-WE WERE-AND THEN YOU CAME!" And Helga just shakes her head and is like "You know what? Whatever floats your boat, Pheebs. Now come on!" Helga helps them up and Arnold is reunited with his parents, and Gerald ends up with Phoebe. **

**Happy Ending? Well…**

**Chapter One: Alpha and Omega  
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**By: darkangel1326  
>Approved and Edited by: Lyco Rogue<br>**

**"What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from"-T.S. ELIOT**

It has been 7 years since their lives changed. One minute ago, they were just children, inhaling the foreign jungle air, and the next minute, everything changed. When Hillwood's infamous couple, Phoebe and Gerald, became an item, all eyes were on them. Everyone wanted to know every juicy detail of their courtship, as if the information were the air that was essential to breathe. But two people did not focus on the courtship. As a matter of fact, they were happy for their best friends. Arnold and Helga had known their best friends were in "like-like" with each other for a while, and the kiss was just the boiling point Gerald and Phoebe had to reach.

When they first began dating, Gerald and Phoebe spent almost all their free time together, depriving Arnold and Helga of their best friends. Gerald and Phoebe were lost in the 'honeymoon phase'. Even when they hung out with their respective best friends, they still talked about their 'other'. As much as they tried to ignore it, Arnold and Helga were just the third wheels that spent time with a lovey-dovey couple. So, they decided to hang out with one another. Although they felt uneasy about this newfound friendship, they knew it was either this new friendship, or lonely nights playing solitaire to the early hours of the day.

At first, Helga kept her walls up, solid and indestructible. It really annoyed Arnold that she wouldn't let him help her. She WAS his friend, why couldn't she just let him in? Although Arnold and Helga fought in the beginning, they still maintained the friendship. It was mostly because Arnold, deep in his soul, knew that Helga was a good person. That she's smart and has feelings. Even if she claimed she didn't know what he was talking about. He was patient. He was there. Whenever they played catch, he understood if she didn't want to speak. He learned he couldn't force her to have a conversation, and he respected it. If she was going to open up, she would do so when she was ready.

Sometimes, they played catch in the park for two solid hours without so much as a word to one another. Sometimes, when they did homework, they would sit in Arnold's room, in complete silence for half an hour intervals, the air was silent with the exception of the fizzing sound of yahoo sodas and the chewing from the snacks they nibbled on.

Despite her protests, Arnold never let Helga walk home alone at night. He always insisted on walking her home after study sessions. She was his friend. And he didn't want to risk her getting mugged. Even Helga G. Pataki's 'Ole Betsy and the Five Avengers' couldn't solve every problem. The walks, at times, would be silent. The sounds of streetlights flickering on and off, the occasional car driving by, and the repetitive sounds of footsteps walking in sync were the only things they heard. Other times, they would fill the air with chats about an Evil Twin movie, or even how much they missed their best friends.

But as time went on, these silent moments together were no longer uncomfortable. Although they didn't say much, they knew they could trust one another. And this trust and comfort made these silent moments more profound than meets the eye.

After a year of this silent, yet comfortable friendship, Helga arrived at the boarding house one day, looking hurt. She knocked, furiously tapping the wood of the old building. A surprised Arnold opened the door and before he could greet her, she hugged him. He was shocked, but instantly hugged her back. She didn't cry. She didn't sniffle. She just buried her face in his neck, letting her walls down. This was the first time she ever opened up to him.

He knew Phoebe was visiting family in Japan, and knew it might be hard for Helga to deal with days without her best friend. But he still couldn't believe she was opening up. _Phoebe must not have too much time at home, _Arnold thought.

He knew he couldn't ask her what was going on, she'd just bring her walls back up. And he knew he couldn't ignore the subject. She was his friend and someone hurt her. He had to do SOMETHING. But instead of asking her about her problems or ignoring them completely, he just looked at her encouragingly, his eyes betraying compassion and sympathy. He was there for her and they had power in silence once again.

After that day, their friendship became more solid as Helga's facade crumbled to Arnold's touch. But Arnold was right. Helga did not want advice. She did not want him to defend her. All she wanted was someone to listen to her. And Arnold was okay with that. That was, until that day, almost 7 years after his parents returned to Hillwood.

Arnold had overheard the conversation but could not believe it. What was he going to do? What was going to happen? He didn't want to do anything drastic! How was he going to tell Helga? The last thought struck him hard.

_Helga, _he thought.

Over the years, as Helga kept her walls up less and less, Arnold got to see the real her more and more. The artistic, creative, beautiful and captivating person she hid from the world. And he was the only person who got to see who she was under her cold, blustery exterior. The truth was, he fell for her. But it wasn't difficult to do. He fell for her easily, almost as if he was seeing the world in black and white, and she stepped in and brought color with her.

What was he going to do? It was either leave Hillwood and Helga, or be separated from his parents again as they returned to San Lorenzo.

He didn't want to lose Helga. She became such a necessary part of his life. Even if she didn't love him, they were still best friends. In a way, they had a connection that Arnold didn't even have with Gerald. She was...part of him now. He needed her and didn't want to lose her.

He blinked and sighed. He was daydreaming again and had to stop. He had to make his choice. Leave Hillwood or be separated from his parents? Leave Helga or be left by his parents?

He had a week to figure it all out. He sighed and sat upright. He stared at the rest of his room and sighed once again. He had so many great memories with her here. That computer chair was where she sat when she talked to him about her life for the very first time. The couch was where she sat whenever they did a partner project. The chair is where she sat when she played checkers with him when Gerald and Phoebe were on a date. He had so many good memories, but none of them were what he wanted.

He wanted to kiss her. Just one more time. They had already kissed two times when they were in fourth grade but neither time did Arnold kiss her back. At 17, he looked back and regretted it. She wasn't his. And she probably never would be. He was in the friend zone with her. She always called him her "best friend, after Phoebe". And he was okay with that for a while, but then he fell for her.

And then he figured it out. _You can't lose what you never had_. He sighed and went to find his parents. He made up his decision.

* * *

><p>The PS 118 students crowded the tiny airport, leaving a certain football head out of air. He was in the midst of a group hug, and it seemed everyone thought it would be appropriate to suffocate him and leave his purple face as their last memory of him.<p>

"Alright! You bunch of saps! Make way! I'm walking here!" Helga said in her old bully voice.

Ever since she had told Arnold about her problems, she stopped bullying people. It wasn't easy to do at first. Bullying was her life, it was either be bullied or bully. But when she saw Arnold cared enough about her, a broken, empty girl, that he would listen to her speak, or be comfortable in their silence, she knew she had to end the self-destructive style. The progress, although sluggish, eventually accumulated. It started when she stopped socking Brainy, and just grew from there.

But don't mistake one thing. She may have become less of a bully, but if she was provoked…well, let's just say, if provoked, Helga wouldn't flinch to bring 'Ole Betsy and the Five Avengers' out of retirement.

Arnold chuckled a bit as he saw Helga walking to him. She had a familiar gray beanie that was covering part of her two pigtails. Her pink shirt, like her childhood dress but shorter, was matched with tattered black skinny jeans. She looked like Helga. And he wouldn't change it.

"Hey, football head! You didn't think you'd be able to leave without so much as a goodbye to me, did you?" Helga said, while grinning.

Arnold grinned too. He loved her sarcasm. "I was so sure I could! Damn! Foiled again!" Arnold said while melodramatically moving his hand to his forehead.

Helga chuckled and playfully socked his shoulder. They stood in silence for a few seconds, while staring at each other's eyes. To the outside world, the silence was awkward and intense. But, in reality, this is what the silence was to them:

"_I'm really gonna miss your sarcasm__,__ Helga. It's part of my days now."_

"_I wish you didn't have to go__,__ Arnold. I need you in my life."_

_**"I don't want to let you go yet." They both thought.**_

The intercom announcement of Arnold's flight being boarded interrupted their silent conversation. She dug her foot into the ground while he grabbed his suitcases and went to everyone for the final hugs. Helga watched and as he left the crowd, she ran after him. Just before he left for baggage screening, he heard footsteps. He turned to see Helga, stopping her short run, and looking at him.

"Helga? What's wrong?" Arnold asked. He dropped his suitcases and was walking towards her when she responded.

"I-I never said goodbye to you." She replied meekly.

Arnold tilted his head to the side. Helga never said anything 'meekly'.

"Arnold! Hurry up son, our flight leaves in half an hour and you still have to go through security," Stella said, and then looked at Helga and saw a glimmer of profound sadness. But she didn't address it, Stella just walked in to security.

Arnold and Helga stood there in silence once again. But he really was running late.

"I'm sorry, Helga. But I really have to go right now," he said as he grabbed his suitcases. He turned towards the security screenings and moved to see her one last time. "Bye, Helga." He said, with the faintest hint of heartbreak.

Helga stood there and watched him walk, but just as he was approaching a corner, she shouted her goodbye. "Arnold! Au revior, Arnold!"

He heard her say her goodbye, but before he could respond security rushed him through. He had no time to think, to figure out, actually, that he found Cecile, and lost Helga at the exact same time…

**A/N: OK, FIRST CHAPTER COMPLETED! YAY! **

**FAIR WARNING: Just to let you guys KNOW what's going to happen, WITHOUT letting you know what's going to happen...well, my name is DARKangel(ignore the numbers for now). There's a reason for that. I'm not really a fluff writer. Anyway, you've been warned. **

**So, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! *ON HANDS AND KNEES, DESPERATE AND LOOKING AT YOU WITH PUPPY DOG EYES* PLEEEEEEAAAAAASSSSSSEEEEEE!**

**BE MY BEST FRIEND! REVIEW THIS PLEASE!**

***CUTE CAT EYES* I'LL LOVE YOU! XD  
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	2. The Beginning and The End

**A/N: Hey Everyone! Wow, let me just start by saying I didn't think I'd get many reviews, but I got 7 for the first chapter :D (one got repeated, but still means a lot). I am still kinda shocked! And I was also favorited. Again…SHOCKER! LOL, so I wanted to thank EVERYONE who has reviewed this fic, meaning SHOUT OUTS!**

**ekida- lol YESSS! My puppy dog eyes worked! :D**

**Coco793- Thanks for your deep interest in this story! You rock, and I will try to update soon, but things are getting kinda hectic with life, so I can't promise anything…but I WILL try :D**

**AJSky7- I feel like you're my biggest fan. Or at least in the top five. All I can say at this moment, is that, YESSSS, I will take you on a roller coaster with this fic, but I have two sayings about my fics. One is that "the night is darkest just before the dawn, but the dawn IS coming." (~IDK if you got this, but that was a "Dark Knight" reference XD) And I also believe what the BEST kind of hope and dream is the kind that you have to persevere to accomplish. Then, when your dream comes true, it becomes that much sweeter. That's all I can say for now.**

**loonytunecrazy- Again, like AJSky7, I consider you one of my most loyal readers. You review pretty much EVERYTHING I publish and I wanna thank you for that :)**

**pinkdolphin92- AGAIN, one of my most loyal people. You are usually the first to review and you NEVER say I do anything wrong, even if I think I do! So thank you so much! Oh, and the story is not going in the direction you believe its going to go. Just read this, and you'll see what I mean.**

**Nep2une-AGAIN, one of my most loyal people! You review EVERYTHING I put up! And you always say a similar thought. Like I wrote for AJSky7, I think the best stories are when we see a diamond in the rough, a phoenix rise from the ashes, kind of things. Because it makes the end result more cherished and more beautiful. But the thing is, if there's no pain, and just reward…its not realistic, its fluff. And I'm horrible at writing it (believe me! I've tried!) So, I PROMISE you, the story may be sad, but if you stay with it towards the end…I think you may like it. **

**Lyco Rogue-OK, so I have already embarrassed you, dedicated a poem to you, and made you edit my work COUNTLESS times so do I REALLY have to say that 'you are one of my most loyal readers?' I think you already KNOW that! LOL. And somehow…you NEVER think my ideas are bad! You push me for the best kind of greatness! You ARE (in some kind of twist of faith) my biggest fan, supporter, and best online friend I have :) *Huggles the heck out of you!* **

**OK, so this is chapter 2! I hope you enjoy it!**

**FAIR WARNING: Just to let you guys KNOW what's going to happen, WITHOUT letting you know what's going to happen...well, my name is DARKangel(ignore the numbers for now). There's a reason for that. I'm not really a fluff writer. So, you've been warned.**

**DISCLAIMER: I, darkangel1326, no matter how much I wish/hope/dream I did, sadly, I DO NOT own Hey Arnold! *sighs sadly* **

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Two: The Beginning and The End<strong>

**By: ~darkangel1326**

**Approved and Edited by: Lyco Rogue**

"**There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart's desire. The other is to gain it."**-**George Bernard Shaw**

He was sitting in the plane's recliner, looking anxiously outside at the passing pieces of land. He inhaled deeply, closed his eyes and had his head in the clouds, as was to be expected. He lifted his lids and sighed happily.

_Today's the day_, Arnold thought. _Today, I'm going to tell her how I feel._

He sighed once again. He had missed his hometown, not only because of its comfortable familiarity but because of the people too. He missed Gerald, his best friend: the one who had invited him to be the best man in his wedding this coming Saturday.

But he couldn't deny the truth. Nor would he want to. He also missed Helga. He missed hugging her, and hearing her laugh in person.

Although it was true they spoke by phone, the occasional skype, and a few handwritten letters, he missed the warmth that was her presence.

Arnold sighed. _Technology does not give her laugh or voice justice._

He couldn't believe it. He hadn't spoken to Helga, in person, since that faithful day, ten years ago.

_Ten years, _he thought. _Where has the time gone?_

But he already knew the answer. When he went to San Lorenzo, he continued his studies via private tutor. He got to apply to college in the States.

But Arnold couldn't go to Hillwood College. It wasn't because he was avoiding Helga. On the contrary, he was desperately hoping Hillwood College would have his major. He changed major three times just so he could be flexible enough to go back home.

But life didn't work in his favor. Hillwood was making him pay high Out-of-State costs, and he couldn't get financial aid from the school because it was a community college.

Instead, Arnold went to a college in Seattle that pretty much gave him a full-ride scholarship. Arnold majored in Biological Sciences. And after 4 years in Seattle, he continued to Med School. Arnold became a General Doctor.

The plane ride, although a bit weary, did provide him with some comfort.

The captain's voice buzzed on the intercom.

_We will be arriving in Hillwood in approximately 30 minutes. I repeat. We will be arriving at Hillwood in 30 minutes._

_Soon,_ he thought, as he fastened his seat belt. _Soon I'll be in your embrace._

* * *

><p>She was driving her car, a bit over the speed limit. She adjusted the mirror and it broke off. Again.<p>

_Stupid crappy car,_ Helga thought as she put the broken mirror to the side.

She was consumed in her thoughts. Phoebe was getting married on Saturday and asked her to be the maid of honor. And Gerald asked Arnold to be the best man. Internally, Helga was laughing at the irony. This would be the second time (repetitively) she and Arnold were asked to be the maid of honor and best man (respectfully) at a wedding.

She sighed. _Arnold._

She was hoping she would move on from him. She tried. The day he left, Helga threw out all of his memorabilia, minus the poetry books and photos of them together. But she didn't throw away everything as dramatically as she had when she drank the false "Love Potion". This time around, she sadly gathered her locket, her Arnold shrine and a black plastic bag. She stuffed everything in there, and then threw these things in the outdoor trashcan. She went inside her house, walked into her room, closed the door, locked it, then fell to her knees and cried.

_Why didn't I just __tell __you I loved you instead of living with these basket case emotions? Arnold, my true love, keeper of my soul, you…you left my life almost as quickly as you came into it._

Helga sighed, shaking her head at the memory. She had to be strong whenever they spoke by phone or via skype. She had to pretend everything was okay, even if, deep down, it wasn't.

Although she knew it was selfish, she couldn't help but wish he had stayed in Hillwood while his parents left. But, as soon as this thought popped into her head, she would internally banish it.

_Arnold was deprived of his parents for__ the__ majority of his life. If anyone deserves to have his parents, it's him._

But she was tired of the secrets. She was tired of putting up a façade and pretending she wasn't in love with her best male friend.

_Today's the day, _she thought. _Today, I'm going to tell him how he makes me feel._

Just then, she heard her cell phone buzz to a Dino Spumoni song, and instantly knew who was calling.

_Speak of the angel, _she thought with a smile.

Once, while skyping, Arnold had a Dino Spumoni song playing in the background; one he said was one of his favorites. So, Helga asked for the name, found it, and used that song for whenever Arnold called.

Shaking her head briefly, she grabbed the steering wheel with her left hand and moved her right hand towards her purse. But, instead, her bag tumbled forward and the cell phone dropped to her car's floor mat.

"Perfect," Helga muttered angrily as she stared at the ringing phone.

She reached a stoplight and unfastened her seatbelt. She moved towards the phone, but the vibrations accompanying the ringtone kept causing the phone to move away from her hand.

"Criminy!" she yelled as she stretched her hand to finally grab the phone.

She sat back up and answered the phone.

"Hello?" she said calmly, although she was feeling the opposite inside.

_I wonder what he wants to say, _she thought.

But she was not greeted with the voice of her beloved. In fact, all she heard was ruffling and moving on the other side. She sighed.

_Just a pocket dial._

As she was about to end the call, she heard the most beautiful sound in the world come from the other end.

"So much has changed," Arnold said.

She sighed softly and nodded. He was right. Ten years can cause a great change in people.

_But my love for you will forever survive, _she couldn't help but think.

She adjusted her phone between her right shoulder and ear, and continued listening. She looked up and saw that the light had just gone green.

"CRAP!" She yelled and hastily stepped on the gas, while her phone fell to the floor again.

A car swerved in front of her and Helga barely to hit the brakes…

* * *

><p>Arnold arrived in Hillwood a few minutes early. He met up with Gerald and exchanged a brief, signature handshake with him. They loaded Gerald's car with Arnold's luggage, and then drove towards the boarding house.<p>

"So man, how's it feel to be back home?" Gerald asked, while keeping his eyes on the road.

Arnold looked outside the window, watching the shops and various people from his seat.

"It's great. I really missed it here. Seattle and San Lorenzo were nice, but it's just nice to be home, you know?" Arnold said as he shifted in his seat, an action he had gotten accustomed to on the long plane ride in vain attempt to get comfortable.

"It hasn't changed much, man. Everything is pretty much the same. Even the people," Gerald commented.

"Gerald, it's been ten years," Arnold said.

"So?" Gerald retorted

Arnold sighed. "So much has changed."

There was a silence in the car. But it wasn't the silence Arnold wanted to hear. It wasn't a silence that was more powerful than the fanciest words of any language, or the silence that was comfortable. This silence just wasn't right.

But Arnold did hear his phone. He took it out of his pocket and saw he accidentally dialed Helga. His eyes widened.

"CRAP!" He heard her yell.

The sound was accompanied by tires screeching, a thud, and harshly forced brakes. There was a second of silence followed by the sound of Helga's car horn…that never stopped beeping.

"HELGA!" Arnold yelled but to no avail.

_No, _he thought. _No, dear God, no please!_

"HELGA! HELGA, I'M HERE NOW! HELGA! C'MON PATAKI, DON'T JOKE AROUND! PICK UP THE PHONE! I'M HERE!"

He waited for two minutes and heard no response, just the horn in the background.

Arnold moved the phone away from his ear and dropped it.

"Yo! Arnold! What's up? You look pale. What's up with Helga?" Gerald asked, worried about Arnold's physical appearance.

Arnold reached for his phone and looked through the windows, both hoping and not hoping to find her accident.

"Whoa! Man! Calm down. What's going on with Pataki?" Gerald asked, still oblivious to the ordeal.

Arnold just looked straight ahead, with the usual optimistic gleam in his eye fading away.

"I-I…M-my phone dialed hers. She was on the p-phone with me. W-when I grabbed my p-phone, I heard her say 'CRAP!', then tires screeching, a thump, and brakes…" Arnold voice was getting caught in his throat.

_It wasn't possible, was it? No, Helga wasn't really…_he couldn't think clearly. He didn't even want to finish thinking his latter thought.

"G-Gerald…I t-th-think H-Helga's…" his voice croaked and he tried to speak again. "I t-think she's…th-think she's…th-think she's hurt."

Arnold, without trying to explain himself, began dialing 9-1-1.

"Man, what are you doing? Who are you calling?" Gerald asked, while parking on the street.

"Gerald, I gotta call 9-1-1 and tell them about the accident. They have to send an ambulance," Arnold said while holding the phone to his ear.

Gerald looked at him. "Do you know where she crashed?"

Arnold winced at the statement. "Not really, but I bet 9-1-1 could triangulate the position or something," Arnold said, trying to convince himself more than Gerald.

"Arnold," Gerald took the phone from his best friend and ended the call. "Our best bet is the hospital. She's probably already there, anyway. Someone may have already reported the accident."

Arnold sighed. _Gerald's right. I mean, it's HELGA here. She's a Pataki, and she promised me she'd live forever. And a Pataki never breaks their promise._

Despite these thoughts, Gerald still saw a single tear escape Arnold's eye…

* * *

><p>Arnold ran into the hospital, leaving Gerald outside, trying to find a place to park. Arnold walked furiously towards the receptionist when he heard a musical laugh.<p>

"Just try to take it easy next time, Helga. You could've been seriously injured," the doctor said.

Helga smirked at the doctor defiantly. "Hey, Doc, you know me. I can't make promises I may not be able to keep," Helga said.

Arnold just stood where he was. She was okay.

"Helga?" Arnold called.

Helga stopped and turned to face Arnold, with a smile growing on her face. "Arnold!"

They both stared at each other.

_**I'm so glad you're here****, **_they both thought, as they got lost in the other's eyes.

Arnold walked, cautiously, towards Helga.

"I'm sorry I pocket dialed you. If I hadn't called you, you wouldn't be here-"

Helga just laughed.

Arnold blinked. "What are you laughing at?"

Helga kept laughing but eventually stopped. "Did you say 'pocketdial'?"

Arnold nodded.

Helga laughed again.

"Ok, seriously Helga, what's so funny?" Arnold asked, confused.

"You basically said you 'butt-dialed' me," Helga said and kept laughing. Eventually, Arnold joined her laughter.

"Yeah, I guess I did," he chuckled.

They laughed a bit longer, then, eventually, got under control.

"Helga?"

"Yeah, Football Head?"

He smiled. "I have something to tell you."

* * *

><p>"Arnold? Hey, Arnold!"<p>

Arnold shook his head. He was daydreaming again, hoping this dream would come true. He face took on a sad expression.

Gerald saw this look. "Arnold, she'll be fine. This is HELGA we're talking about. As in HELGA G. PATAKI. She's a fighter," Gerald told him.

Arnold gave him a weak smile. _Gerald's right. She'll be fine, maybe a few stitches, or a few broken bones, but she'll be fine. She always is…_

Gerald left Arnold in front of the hospital, while he looked for parking. Arnold ran into the ER of Hillwood's Medical Center.

Instantly, his ears heard wailing from two women.

"Oh! My poor baby sister! Mommy! Daddy! I-" she squeaked the rest.

There was Helga's mother, looking sad, but alert, with a bit of mascara on her face, to match her daughter's complexion. "I know Olga, it's hard to wait. But she'll be fine. Helga's strong. You gotta remember that."

Then, Arnold heard a loud thump coming from the receptionist's office.

"DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?" Big Bob says, at the top of his lungs.

The nurse looked at him patiently. "Sir, I know your daughter's condition may be distressing to you and your family, but you must keep calm-"

"KEEP CALM? MY DAUGHTER WAS JUST IN AN ACCIDENT AND SHE'S IN THE ER! AND YOU WANT ME TO CALM DOWN?"

"Sir, please, keep clam. If not, then I'll have no choice but to call security. Your daughter is in critical condition, but we have our best working on her right now. So please, sit over at the waiting room and try to calm down," the nurse said, sternly, but soothingly.

Big Bob huffed but complied.

Arnold just tried to let it all sink in. She was going to be fine. The nurse said their best was working on her, right now. They would save her life.

He sighed and went to sit at the opposite side of the waiting room. Olga's cries made him uneasy, but he felt warmth in the fact that they were worried about her.

_She'll be better soon, I just know it, _Arnold thought. _She told me she'd live forever, and a Pataki never goes back on their word…_

Arnold wasn't sure how long he was there. All he knew was that it was a very long time. Phoebe came, after getting the call from Gerald, and sobbed slightly in her fiancé's embrace.

_Please be ok, Helga, _Phoebe thought. Gerald rocked her gently and tried to hush her to sleep.

They were there for hours.

Arnold was still weary from the plane ride. The chairs in the hospital weren't comfortable either. He knew his body was going to be sore, but he didn't care. All that mattered to him was Helga and her well-being.

_Don't leave me,Pataki. Don't you dare leave me you beautiful, wonderful, amazing person. Don't you DARE leave me in this world, Helga. I need you…I…I love you._

"I wonder what's taking so long?" Arnold asked, to one in particular.

Phoebe looked up at him and tried to clear away her tears. "It probably means she's still alive. On occasions where the person is seriously injured, and in a critical condition, doctors don't usually speak to the family and friends for hours because they are still operating on the body. This means Helga is still responsive enough for them to save her," Phoebe said, quietly.

Suddenly, though, Arnold looked up. He heard footsteps vibrant from the walls of the deserted hallway. It was the doctor, with an unreadable, but visibly tired expression on his face.

The doctor walked over to the Pataki family. He spoke to them, and Arnold watched as Helga's mother and sister cried loudly, while Bob just looked off into space. Arnold had to look away from them.

_That doesn't mean anything, Arnold. She's not…no. NO! She can't be! Maybe, she's paralyzed and the doctor told them she may need a wheelchair for the rest of her life. Or maybe…maybe she's in a coma…no! NO Arnold, this is Helga. She promised you she'd live forever. She's probably out of surgery, recovering in intensive care right now. In a week, she'll be acting as if this had never happened.__She has to be! Phoebe's wedding is this Saturday, Helga would never ruin the biggest day of her best friend's life! _

Arnold heard the doctor's footsteps coming towards him, Gerald and Phoebe. It was the footsteps of the man who carried Arnold's faith in life in his simple words. Those words were going to change him forever…

"Are you here to tell us about Helga?" Gerald asked, in place of Arnold and Phoebe.

Both parties looked up and hoped for the best.

"Yes," The doctor replied, in an unreadable tone.

There was a silence that enveloped the room, until a brave voice ventured for the truth.

"What's her condition?" Arnold croaked out.

The doctor looked at them with an unreadable expression, then reached into his pocket and pulled out a pink ribbon.

"Are you Arnold?" he asked Arnold.

Arnold nodded and gulped. He did not like where this was going.

"She told me to give this to you," the doctor handed Arnold the pink bow. The doctor looked at all three of them. "I'm sorry. But she's-"

Arnold looked up from the pink bow in his hand, and, closed his pained eyes. "Dead."

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><p><strong>AN: *awkwardly pulls at collar* SO… *cricket cricket*. Ok ok, I know. Everyone wants to kill me right now for this ending. *Tries to be rational while she gets mobbed by people with torches and pitchforks* Uh…well, the thing is, well, things are not always as they seem. No worries! This fic is long! Like 20 some chapters! There's A LOT of story to tell! I swear! And, also, I know I may await some serious hate for this ending, but, think about this. This story says "Arnold & Helga". Think about it…that's all I will say. Any questions about the ten years that separated them or something that was unclear, like maybe explain how the quote is relevant to the chapter are WELCOMED! BUT! PLEASE! Don't FLAME me. I understand you may be upset with me right now but I did warn you (twice too) that I DO NOT WRITE FLUFF!**

**So, anyway, be kind (I'm still a human being after all!) with me and:**

**REVIEW THIS CHAPTER! **

***BIG CUTE ADORABLE, HUGABLE CAT EYES* PLEASE REVIEW! **


	3. The Man Who Wouldn't Accept the Truth

**A/N: Hey guys! *Rubs back of neck sheepishly* Remember me? The writer who wanted to update frequently and consistently. Yah, that's me. **

**I wanna start by saying I'm sorry for not updating as much as I said I would. I tried, (Lyco is witness) but this chapter was hard for me to write. It took a lot out of me. Mostly because of Arnold's mental/emotional state. **

**To reach this point, I had to dig deeper then I've ever done with prose. With poetry, it's easier for me. All I do is type while bleeding. But with prose, I have to analyze why I'm bleeding. It was something I was trying to avoid to do, even though I knew it had to be done. And, when March 12th came, and the story "Not A Regular Day", Lyco told me that I found the emotion I was trying to find. I tried to write it, but the thing is that my finals for college were approaching and, well, I had to study for those. I finished my finals on Friday and wrote two drafts for beta reading on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. Yeah, I know today is Sunday, but I stayed awake until I finished my third draft, and sent it early this morning. **

**Luckily this is my final draft for this chapter (as of now).**

**YAY: D I'm glad I can finally add a new chapter that is worth your long wait!**

**DISCLAIMER: I, darkangel1326, in no way, shape, or form, own Hey Arnold!**

**Now, without further ado…**

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><p><strong>Chapter 3: The Man Who Wouldn't Accept the Truth<strong>

**By: ~darkangel1326**

**Approved and edited by: Lyco Rogue**

"**The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are." – Chauncey Depew**

He wasn't going to believe it. He didn't want to. He kept going back to the street corner, looking at the skid marks from her car. Hearing the accident's sounds from the phone call. He closed his eyes and imagined how it happened.

_She's gone_. He thought painfully to himself.

She left his life just as quickly as she came into it.

But why did she do this to him? Didn't she see that he loved her? That he wanted to be with her, no matter the cost? Why did she leave? Why did she make him fall in love with her, and then leave him in the world alone?

He desperately wanted to release his anger and blame her. It was her fault. She was the one who did this to him. She was the girl that challenged his world, causing it to shatter to pieces with a simple touch. And, just as he was picking up the fragments, she vanished like yesterday's night sky.

He couldn't handle it. He loved her. He hated her. He wanted her here. He wanted to forget her. His mind was at a constant process of indecisiveness since she died. He was barely even himself nowadays. This past week had gone by in a blur, every day seeming as gray at the last. Until this day came with the morning sunrise.

It was her funeral today.

Arnold knew this day was coming, he knew ever since the doctor gave him her ribbon. The funeral loomed over him, like the dark skies that rained on Hillwood for the past week.

_Even the sky is crying for her, _he thought.

He didn't know what to do. He never liked funerals; they were always too sad to bear. The testimonials were the things he didn't want to face. All his friends would probably have a funny or touching moment they shared with Helga. But he didn't have any uplifting anecdotes. His last memory with her was hearing her die because of his phone.

The phone that's service was currently disconnected to prevent another tragedy it could cause.

_No Arnold. It wasn't the phone…_

Arnold sighed. _It was my fault_, he thought, for what may have been the millionth time since he got home from the hospital.

Arnold wasn't going to her funeral. He was too broken to see her. He didn't want to reminisce about her. He didn't want to believe she'd only be a memory.

_A memory. _The word caused his soul to crack a bit more.

"Hey, Arnold? What are you doing here, man? Don't you know what today is?" Gerald asked, appearing from the opposite side of the street.

Gerald noticed how Arnold was acting lately. _Everyone's noticed Arnold, _he thought to himself.

Gerald remembered the drive to the boarding house was the most silent it had ever , in the driver's seat, looking ahead of the dark road, while Phoebe, who was sitting on the passenger seat, had her arms around her, silently crying from the news. But, when Gerald looked at the driver's mirror, he saw Arnold, sitting stiffly against the seat, caressing the pink ribbon in his hands.

Arnold isolated himself from his friends until recently, but Gerald, having found Arnold on this street corner more than on one occasion, immediately learned what this place meant.

"Gerald, I just can't-" Arnold managed to say before his voice croaked, breaking Gerald away from his thoughts.

"Arnold, I feel bad for you and Phoebe. She was important to you guys. And, over the years, she and I became close too. I sympathize for you, and everything you're going through. But Phoebe is going to the funeral. She's going to say goodbye to her best friend, even though it hurts her. C'mon man, Helga wouldn't want you to be like this. We both know that's true."

Arnold sighed. He saw the reason in Gerald's point. But it didn't matter.

"Gerald, don't you get it? I killed her! If she hadn't picked up my pocket dial, she'd be getting ready to be the _maid of honor at your wedding tomorrow instead of lying in that coffin and postponing the whole thing,_" He knew he should've accepted it, but he couldn't. Something didn't feel right.

Was he supposed to feel like this? Like she was still with him? Like she never left? Was it because he couldn't let her go? Or was it possible that she-

"Arnold," Gerald said, while grabbing Arnold's shoulders and shook him. "I know you feel guilty, man. But it's not your fault! Sometimes, Fate has other plans."

"But Gerald, this CAN'T be Fate's plan! Something HAS to have screwed up! Fate wanted us together! What was the point of me falling for her if-if" Arnold stopped, not able to utter the words.

Gerald released his grip on Arnold slightly, and gave him a sympathetic look. "Arnold, I know it's tough. I know you loved her. But, she's gone. Sometimes there's just a random chain of events that cause a tragedy. It's just... Fate. As much as it hurts, you have to move on. You have to accept that maybe you two weren't fated after all," Gerald said.

Arnold just gave Gerald a blank stare. Why couldn't he understand that when Helga died, part of him did too?

"What if I can't move on?" Arnold finally asked.

"You have to," Gerald said. He grabbed one of Arnold's arms and pulled him away from the street corner.

"Where are you taking me?" Arnold asked.

"To the funeral, so you can let her go," Gerald said.

Arnold stopped and held his ground while Gerald tugged at his arm, unable to get him to move forward. Gerald stopped, looked at Arnold and began pulling his collar, but Arnold kept his footing.

"You can't make me go, Gerald. I'm not going." Arnold firmly stated.

Gerald sighed but he didn't try to further argue with his friend. "At least promise me one thing."

Arnold looked at Gerald, cautiously. "What?"

"Leave this street corner. You're torturing yourself every time you come here. Just go home, Arnold. Stop trying to blame yourself for something that was fated to happen."

Arnold nodded stiffly and shifted his gaze to the concrete beneath his feet.

"Talk to you later, okay buddy?" Gerald said.

"Yah…talk to you later," Arnold said

_They exchanged their usual handshake and went their separate ways; one headed to a funeral, the other avoiding it._

Arnold wandered away from the street corner, a desolate soul, and a man in black, aimlessly searching for a way to become healed. Or at least stitched back together.

_Do I even deserve to be brought back together? _He wasn't sure anymore. Did he deserve his soul mate to cure his injuries? Or was the torture of her death his true fate?

Arnold just wanted to close his eyes and pretend that this hadn't happened. He wished this hadn't happened. But he had to grow up. Sometimes, not everything had a bright side. Not every cloud had a silver lining.

_She's gone. And she isn't coming back._

But why did she pick up her phone in the first place? This was the 21stcentury! Why didn't she have a Bluetooth? But then, he remembered…

_It was two weeks ago, when Arnold told Helga he had something important to tell her when he got back. She was driving, on her way to work, and was using her Bluetooth._

"_Won't you tell me?" Helga asked, pleadingly._

"_Nope" Arnold replied quickly._

"_Why not__,__ Football Head?" she continued, pouting._

_Arnold chuckled. Even on the phone, he could see her pouty lips._

"_I want it to be a surprise," he answered, realizing how lame it sounded__._

_Much to his delight, Helga giggled. He loved her giggle._

"_Okay, okay. I'll try to wait 'till you come-"_

_There was a silence._

"_Helga?" he asked, thinking she was playing a joke on him once again._

_More silence._

_"Hellooooo? Helga? Are you there? Marco?" Arnold said, as he checked his phone._

_The screen showed seconds were ticking by._

_Stupid cell phone company, __he thought. I knew I should've switched to-_

_He heard a click and then rustling. _

"_Arnold?"_

_He smiled._

"_I'm still here, Marco," he answered__. _

_Helga chuckled, remembering the 'Marco-Polo' game they played whenever a call dropped._

"_Polo! __Sorry 'bout that, my Bluetooth isn't working right now. I don't know why this piece of crap is acting up. I gotta buy a new one now, and I still have to pay for my rent-"_

"_Helga, I have an extra one. I could send it to you. That way you don't have to waste money on a new one," Arnold said__._

"_Thanks Arnold, but, it's okay, I'll just try to-"_

"_Seriously Helga, it's okay. You always send me stuff anyway__;__ it's my turn to pay it forward."_

_Helga laughed. He was so cute._

"_Well, if you insist, I guess I'll take it off your hands. But don't say I never did you any favors!"_

_He chuckled. "Whatever you say, Helga."_

He slapped his forehead. He never sent her the headset. He brought it with him to give to her when he saw her, instead of sending it to her. All because he wanted to give it to her in person, instead of keeping his promise to her and just mailing it to begin with. …

_But then again, she didn't HAVE to pick up. Why couldn't she just wait until he gave her the Bluetooth? Why did she have to pick up the phone while driving? Couldn't she have just parked somewhere first?_

_It's her fault too. __A part of his mind said._

_But another moral part of his mind, scolded this thought._

_How can you blame her? She's dead._

_The words cut him worse than fragments of frozen glass. She was dead. And he was putting the blame on her. He couldn't believe he let himself think, even for a second, that Helga was at fault._

_What's wrong with me? __He thought. __Am I really this selfish?_

_He kicked a rock and watched it skid into the street as a car narrowly missed it._

_Why didn't the driver move away faster? I mean, he probably wasn't distracted with anything. Couldn't he look in front of him, see that a car was still moving forward and just WAIT for it to pass? What was his deal? Didn't he think?__ Arnold said, letting these thoughts manifest inside his brain._

_Until, a little voice whispered its thoughts._

_That man is still in the hospital. He has two kids and a loving wife. They don't know if he's going to survive, or if he'll be paralyzed from the waist below._

Arnold blinked and instantly regretted his thoughts. _Why am I so selfish? I'm thinking of my own problems when I should be thinking of everyone else's. That guy's family doesn't know if he'll live to see the next hour, Helga's gone, and here I am, trying to blame them for something that affected them._

_But why did this have to happen to them, anyway? Helga was an amazing person, and she deserved to have a good life. And the driver did too. Why were they supposed to suffer? What kind of Just God did this?_

_Is God even Just? The world was a cruel place. Helga was a good person who had a family that rarely noticed her. The driver had a good life and was currently on the brink of life and death. Where was the justice in that?_

_It's God's fault._

A little voice whispered to him once more.

_Arnold…_it scolded.

He sighed and stopped trying to point fingers at people. Like his Grandpa always told him, "point a finger at someone, and three are always point back."

He walked to the bridge over the stream in the park and looked miserably at his reflection. He closed his eyes and remembered how he found Helga here every now and then in his youth. It was always after her parent's fought, or when Olga visited.

He opened his eyes and looked back at the stream flowing under him. He stared at his reflection and waited. He waited and waited and waited, but he never saw golden hair or a perfectly pink ribbon. And he never would.

He walked to a bench and sat down. He sighed and tried to stay calm.

_Do I even deserve to be stitched together? _He couldn't help but rethink.

As much as he thought the contrary, Arnold was Atlas, carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. It wasn't too hard to do when Helga was alive, because she gave him temporary relief. He didn't notice how heavy his life was until she left his world. _T_hat day, almost a week ago, he felt the pressure from the planet double in size. And he was succumbing to it.

He wasn't sure anymore.

He looked at the bench, his surroundings, and realized where he was. It was the bench where Helga comforted him after Lila dumped him. It was the same bench their egg hatched under. Most importantly, it was at this bench, roughly ten years ago, where he told her he was leaving.

It was times like these that he missed what he'd never have again. He spent his entire week either on the street corner of the accident or his childhood room. But unlike times in his youth, his Grandpa never came into his room to give him anecdotal advice. He never would either.

His Grandma was the first to leave his life and his Grandpa left a few days later.

Arnold sighed. He had a great life here in Hillwood. He had loving grandparents and the friendship of the most amazing girl in the world. But he left, and lost this forever.

You never know what you have until you lose it; Arnold was learning this in the worst possible way.

He walked back to the boarding house. He opened the door to let a herd of animals run out.

"Arnold?" he heard his mother call him.

But Arnold didn't want to talk. He didn't want his mom to keep trying to cheer him up. He ignored her until her voice came closer.

"Arnold? Why haven't you picked up your phone? We were worried about you," Stella said to him.

Arnold, who had already begun climbing the stairs, turned his head slightly and spoke. "I didn't take it with me."

Stella blinked, and ventured further. "Why didn't you?"

Arnold sighed. "Why should I? So I could accidentally call and kill someone else?"

Stella looked up. Her son was having a hard time ever since the girl had died.

_The one he loved_, she reminded herself painfully._ And the one who loved him._

Even though Stella and Helga didn't have much interaction with one another, when Stella saw the look on both of their faces at the airport, as they were about to face separation, she just knew. She knew they were in love.

Which made Helga's death more tragic.

Stella and Miles had been at the Boarding House, checking up on the property and making sure the Boarders were happy with the atmosphere. Gerald's dad, Martin, did the bookkeeping for them, since they still loved to travel the world. But, they typically visited Sunset Arms every 4 months since the deaths of Miles's mom and dad.

When Arnold walked in the house, the day of Helga's death, Stella's motherly instincts kicked in. Something was wrong, but she wasn't sure what it was. All she saw was Arnold, his eyes red and puffy with a dying gleam, clutching a familiar pink ribbon in his hand.

He didn't speak coherently for days. All he would mutter was "she can't be gone".

It was a week since the incident. Luckily, he spoke complete sentences now, but he didn't speak as often as Stella would like. And when he did, he would often speak sadly, blaming himself for something that was out of his power to control.

She heard him climb the stairs, and dragging his feet.

Hastily, she ran up the stairs, past his dejected form, blocking his room's entrance. Her son merely lifted his head, showing her a pair of eyes that were pained beyond his years.

"Arnold-"

"Look Mom, can we just not talk about it? I really don't want to," Arnold said, interrupting her.

"Arnold, you've been moping around for days. You barely eat, and barely speak. I'm worried, son. I'm worried about you," Stella said, as she reached out to him with a comforting hand.

Arnold tensed as her hand came closer, and she dropped it to her side.

"It's not healthy to blame yourself for something that isn't your fault," Stella said softy.

"Why does everyone keep saying that?" Arnold responded bitterly.

"Because it's true. Because, sometimes, what we think is our Fate, is actually just part of a bigger picture," she said, in a soothing, motherly tone.

She walked over to her son, embracing him and looked up at his eyes, causing her brown eyes to grow with concern. His emerald eyes were losing their innocence, replacing it with sorrow.

"Arnold-"

But he broke the embrace and ran past her, up the stairs to his room, and locked the door.

Arnold was trying to be alone. He wanted to think.

Fortunately for Arnold, his grandparents never rented his room, so everything was the same way he left it ten years ago. He went to his bed and lay there, looking at the clouds, drowning himself in his memories.

"Arnold?" there was a persistent tapping at his door. Arnold didn't want to answer. Then there was a shaking of the doorknob.

"Son, open the door!" It was his dad this time.

Arnold still didn't answer. Coming home was a bad idea. They wouldn't let him think. He had to get out of this mad house. He had to escape.

Arnold got up from his bed and climbed the stairs to reach the rooftop. He hastily went down the fire escape as noiseless as possible and then ran.

But he wasn't running from his parents. He was running from the truth. He was running from his problems. And he wasn't sure if he would ever stop running.

But he did stop.

He stopped at the stoop of a familiar blue house. He blinked. Somehow, this was the last place he wanted be, but the one place he needed to see.

_Helga's House_, he thought. He climbed a few steps and peeked in the window to the living room. Although the house was temporarily deserted since Helga's family went to her funeral, the atmosphere of her home was missing something. It was as if the walls lost a bit of color, or the air tasted less crisp. The Pataki's were missing something that could change the dull environment into a home once more.

Just as he found a bit of comfort knowing her family did not forget her death, he froze. There were boxes on the floor. Each one of them saying "Helga".

_No, _he thought. _What are they doing? She's only been gone a week and they already have her stuff packed up?_

Arnold was upset. His emotions were reaching their limit.

How was he the only one suffering? Why couldn't anyone understand? Gerald didn't understand why he couldn't let Helga go yet. Phoebe was letting her best friend go too quickly. His parents didn't understand he lost someone special. No one understood him.

She was dead. He felt alone. He kept trying to hold on to her memories while others tried to get him to let go and forget.

_But don't you want to forget her too? This pain, this torment is going to keep haunting you here. She's everywhere. Her lingering remnants mark each part of this city with the ghost of her memory. __A small voice said to him._

It was at that moment Arnold knew what he needed to do. He gathered his emotions, his last pieces of strength, and walked away from the house.

_I have to get out of this city._

There he walked, hands forced in his pockets, head hung low. The broken man. The man who wouldn't accept Fate.

Was it really possible for his soul mate to leave him alone in life?

Arnold wasn't sure if he wanted an answer to that question.

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><p><strong>AN: I just want you all to know that this chapter is 8 pages long on Word. You know, 8 pages with a 0.7 margin around the page and Ariel font, size 10 font.**

**I think this is the longest chapter so far, which makes me look forward to the chapters that are supposed to be long...  
><strong>

**Anyways, please tell me what you think! I will TRY to publish another chapter, but I have 6 days till Lyco goes on hiatus so *rolls up sleeves* yup this is going to be fun.**

**REVIEW THIS CHAPTER!**

**Please! I'll love you more with the passing days! ;D**

**PS Now that we've partially scratched the surface (and plot) of this fic, let the fun begin!**


	4. What Brings Me Back Alive

**A/N: Why hello there! Guess who's back ;D Yup I'm surprised too. For a minute there, I wasn't sure I'd publish so soon, but, the kinks of this chapter actually worked out! YAY! So I'm trying to make up for the MONTHS of no updates by giving two this week! HOORAY FOR SPRING BREAK! I hope you like this chapter. Because this is where the plot begins! However, assume nothing. I have tricks up my sleeve, and I'm not exactly "conventional" in stories. At the end of the chapter, I'll reveal why I chose this title. **

**So enough talk! Let's get on with the story!  
><strong>

**DISCLAIMER: I, darkangel1326, in no way, shape, or form, own Hey Arnold! characters. However, other characters are totally mine!**

**Dedicated to my beta, Lyco Rogue. This is most likely the last chapter she will beta for me for a while. *Salutes* Enjoy your hiatus, and next month, I will do my best to not disappoint you :D  
><strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 4: What Brings Me Back Alive<strong>

**Written by: ~darkangel1326**

**Approved and Edited by: Lyco Rogue**

"**Once I knew only darkness and stillness... my life was without past or future... but a little word from the fingers of another fell into my hand that clutched at emptiness, and my heart leaped to the rapture of living."****-****Helen Keller**

It was pitch black. There wasn't a light to guide her anywhere new. There wasn't a reaper to carry her somewhere. There was only darkness, and silence. But this was not like the silence she had with Arnold; this silence was eerie.

"Hello?" she yelled into the abyss she was in. No response, not even an echo.

"Anyone here?" she continued, a bit softer.

Nothing.

_Where am I? _She thought to herself. _How did I get here?_

She drifted in this place of nothingness for an immeasurable amount of time and then, heard voices coming from a path of light.

"Hey! Can you help me? I don't know where I am," she called in the light's general direction.

The voices continued chattering amongst themselves.

_Criminy! I gotta do everything __myself, _she thought bitterly.

Helga ran towards the light, as fast as she could, to try to figure out what was going on, but quickly realized that she was going nowhere. It was as if she were floating in the darkness and there was no ground under her.

The voices spoke once more, but she couldn't understand anything past murmurs. They sounded like they were trying to come up with a plan, but she wasn't sure of what.

She heard faint sounds of ruffling, and an affirmative agreement.

Slowly, the darkness consumed her once again. And Helga had no choice but to let it devour her.

She woke with a start, practically leaping out of the hospital bed.

_The hospital bed? _She thought.

She brought her hand to her head. _Man, I feel like I got hit by a truck._

She blinked. The accident. She heard Arnold scream her name.

Then it was coming back to her. The phone ringing, her purse, the car, the car horn, and Arnold's pleas for her to be alright.

_Arnold, _her heart ached. _Poor Arnold probably thinks I'm dead. But I'm fine. Sore as hell, but fine._

She climbed out of bed, and stood on the ground.

_That's funny, _she thought. _I thought I was taller… _

The door opened to reveal a nurse. They exchanged looks and the nurse went over to her.

"Please Miss. Sit back in bed. We need you to rest, you're still not fully recovered," the nurse said.

Helga didn't fight her, because she was starting to feel aching. Helga, with the help of the nurse, climbed back into bed.

"I'll bring your family, since you're awake now. They've been worried about you, especially after they found out you had to go into surgery," the nurse said.

_Surgery? _Helga thought. _I guess that explains the voices I heard._

_Hello?_

Helga looked up but found she was in a room to herself. All the other beds were currently vacant at this time.

Helga grabbed her head.

_I must be hearing things. _She thought.

_You're not._

Helga gasped. What was going on? Did the surgery come with hallucinations too? Who was talking to her? That voice, it didn't sound familiar to her at all.

"Who are you?" Helga said, and froze.

Her voice wasn't hers. It sounded nothing like her. But it sounded just like the voice that was talking to her.

_I'm Erin. Erin Dawkins. Who are you?_

"Helga. Helga G. Pataki," Helga said aloud, once more startled by the unfamiliar voice coming from her mouth.

Erin felt as if she heard the name before.

Is it possible that she…that she Erin thought to herself, remembering the doctor's relief to find one, at the last minute.

_Helga? _Erin said.

"Yeah?" Helga said aloud.

_I'm sorry you saved my life, _Erin said, gravely.

"What do you mean I saved your life? What do you have to be sorry for?" Helga questioned, feeling herself paling as the seconds ticked by.

_You still don't see it, do you? _The voice responded.

Helga shook her head.

_You're the donor who saved my life, _Erin said.

"Really? I saved your life with a couple of dimes?" Helga replied.

_No, Helga. I mean __you gave me your heart, as a donor. Because you no longer needed it, _Erin said.

Helga felt herself shake, but the voice continued.

_You're dead Helga. And you saved me from dying too. _

Helga felt the words take over and repeat in her mind.

_D-dead…_

She was losing herself, feeling herself shrink away, and felt Erin, becoming stronger and stronger.

Suddenly, she could see it again. The accident. She was rushed to the hospital, and had her pink ribbon, clutched in her hands.

She held on to it for dear life.

The doors without handles flew open as her body, which was badly bleeding and broken on the stretcher, was pushed through.

Helga was brought to a room, with a light above her constantly blinking eyes.

She heard the door without handles open and heard many people rush at this new arrival.

Their chattering was nonsensical to Helga's ears. She felt her life slipping away from her. But she had to hold on, long enough to ask for a final favor.

_D-d-dead…_

She saw a shadow, hover over her, telling her she something she couldn't understand. She nodded, not really aware of what was going on. She felt herself get drowsier and drowsier with time. The seconds felt like a heavy eternity as Death was closing her eyes.

But Helga fought to stay alive. She fought to give a message.

A shadow loomed over her, and she wasn't sure if it was the doctor, or Death itself. Either way, with the last bit of life that was pumping through her heart, she held up her hand, with the pink ribbon, shakily and said, "A-Arnold".

She felt the shadow over her clutch the ribbon and, soon afterwards, felt her grip on the world shatter beneath her.

_D-d-dead…_

Helga looked and saw that she was in the nothingness she had started from. But it wasn't calling to her, or containing her against her will. It just was. She felt herself scream in terror, and was disrupted when she remembered her last, coherent train of thought.

_A-Arnold…_

She fell to her knees, still drifting away in the darkness, and released the tears she held in the past ten years. The tears of missing him, of loving her best friend, and, worst of all, of never telling him she loved him.

Helga heard a door opening. She ran, for what like seemed like forever, and tried to will herself to see what was happening in the outside world.

Erin's family, it seemed, had come into the room. All of their faces relieved when they saw her sitting up. They talked excitedly with her and laughed with one another.

Helga sighed. _She has the life I always wanted._

_No, I don't. _Erin thought, subconsciously hearing Helga.

Helga jumped. _You can hear me?_

Erin, on the outside, felt her eyes widen the smallest bit.

_Yes, I can._

Helga didn't know what to say. How was this possible? She was dead. Shouldn't she be living in the afterlife? Heaven? Hell?

Or was that a lie? Is everyone who ever lived stuck on earth, as a spirit?

_I don't know what's going on either… _

Helga felt herself, subconsciously, put a hand on her heart, as she thought these things through. Meanwhile, Erin had to pretend, once more in her life, that everything was fine.

As Erin's family walked out the door, Erin placed a hand on her new heart.

_Helga's heart._

She wished this hadn't happened. Even if it meant she herself would not live, she never willingly would've taken Helga's heart.

But hers was too weak to work anymore.

_What's your story? _Helga asked, curiously.

Erin heard her and wasn't sure how to respond. Although it was true they could communicate, Erin was still unsure of how it worked.

_Yeah, I'm still trying to figure it out __too, _Helga said.

Erin blinked. Then, she decided to try something.

"Helga, can you hear me?" she spoke softly.

_Yeah, I can. _Helga responded.

_How about now? _Erin thought.

_I still can, even more than before, _Helga said.

_Okay__,__ Helga, now you try. Talk to me verbally and mentally, to see how this __works, _Erin said.

_I am talking to you verbally right now, _Helga said.

There was a silence that followed.

_Helga? Earth to Helga…come in Helga, _Erin thought.

_You didn't hear me? _Helga asked.

_Hear what? _Erin responded.

_Hear me ask if you could hear me when I was thinking in my head. _Helga said, already knowing the answer.

_Nope, _Erin responded.

Maybe, the person who is in control of the body can have everything heard, while the other one can withhold information, Helga mused.

_Helga? Are you there? _Erin spoke.

_Oh yeah, I'm here. Say, Erin? How about we switch? _Helga said, wanting to see prove her theory.

_Switch? Switch what? _Erin said, puzzled.

_Switch so that I can control your body, and you are in here? _Helga said, purposefully leaving out the desolate room she was currently in.

_Is this part of a theory or something? _Erin said.

_Yeah it is. Anyway, are you gonna switch with me or not? _Helga asked, a bit annoyed at the delay.

_Are we gonna switch back? _Erin asked.

Helga sighed. Even if she denied Erin her body, she still couldn't see Arnold as she was. She was in another girl's body, in an unknown place. Plus, she wasn't even sure if Arnold was still at Hillwood. The last she remembered, he was only going to visit the city…

_We will. _Helga said, sadly.

Neither of them was sure how to switch back, but Helga had an idea.

When I was in control of Erin's body, I felt in power. Like I was in complete control. But as soon as she told me I was dead, I grasped onto her body less and less. I have to will myself to take over, even though it's not my body. Helga thought to herself.

_Uh Helga? How do we switch? _Erin thought, completely unaware of Helga's thoughts.

_Just let me handle it, _Helga said.

Erin shrugged her shoulders and closed her eyes.

I can do this, Helga thought to herself, trying to pump herself up. I have to, I need to tell Arnold that I…that I love him.

Helga closed her eyes and tried to focus on living. She focused on trying to control Erin's body. She tried to will herself to take control, but felt like her attempts were useless.

Maybe I have to think of something else, she thought.

It was then that Erin turned to see a window. Helga followed Erin's gaze, and caught sight of a relaxed, outside garden.

_Arnold, _she said.

She remembered the memories she shared with her beloved football head. All the times they had together, every adventure they had, and their last goodbye.

_Au revior, Arnold, _she said to him.

"Arnold!" she said in Erin's voice. She blinked. Did it work? Was she in control?

"Can you hear me Erin?" she said, in Erin's voice.

_Yeah, I can. _Erin responded.

_How about now? _Helga thought.

_I can still hear you, _Erin said.

Silence.

_Erin, are you thinking at me? _Helga asked.

_Couldn't you hear me? _Erin asked.

_No, I couldn't, _Helga responded.

She can't hear my thoughts? So, does this mean the person in control of my body can have all their thoughts heard, meanwhile, the person in here can have private thoughts? Erin thought.

_I think I proved myself right, _Erin heard Helga think.

_Wait, was this your theory? How, whoever is in control of the body can have their thoughts read, meanwhile, the person here can have their thoughts private? _Erin asked.

_That was exactly what I was thinking, _Helga thought, amused by the coincidence.

_So, how are we gonna switch back? _Erin asked.

_Well, this is gonna be tougher. I took control by willing to be alive. You have to do the same__; __meanwhile, I have to let you take over. _Helga said.

_Ok, I can do this. _Erin thought, as she willed herself to take over.

_You can do this Helga, _Helga thought to herself. _Just don't think of Arnold, and you'll be fine._

Helga reminded herself she was dead, and let her death replay in her mind, feeling herself clutch Erin's body, less and less.

Meanwhile, Erin tried to remember why she needed to live. She had a family, she had to get her own clinic, she was given another chance to live.

Erin felt herself sitting up with a bed underneath her. She did it; her body was in her control again.

_Hey Helga? _Erin asked.

_Yeah? _Helga said.

_Who's Arnold?_

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><p><strong>AN: Aren't I cruel? Yup, I'm ending the chapter right here.**

** Anyways, the title of this chapter is "What Brings Me To Life", and I chose this title because it was meant to answer the question in the end. :O Think about it!**

**Also, the name "Erin Dawkins" is a reference to where the story has moved to, location wise. If you can figure out where it is (and if I have told you, do not tell others) well, IDK what I'd do exactly, but I'd probably end up giving a shout out! :D**

**I also wanted to clarify something. From this point on, you have to pay close attention to underlining and italics. In this chapter, I use italics for thoughts of the person controlling Erin's body or when someone is saying something, because they are not in control of the body. The underlining is used when the person NOT in control of Erin's body but is thinking. The underline are the only private thoughts. When the person in control of the body, they are in public in the outside world and in the inside world. Meanwhile, the one NOT in control is hidden from the world, meaning they have hidden thoughts. Hopefully that makes sense. If not, PM me so I can clarify it.**

**Also, some people have been telling me their theories of what will happen in the story. I kinda wanna hear what you guys think! It would be interesting to see where you guys see this story going. Who knows? You could be absolutely right, and not even know it! Feel free to add a theory in your review.**

**Which reminds me! **

**REVIEW THIS CHAPTER!**

**Please! *cute puppy dog/kitten eyes***

**I'll love you more each day! :D  
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	5. Long Gone and Moved On

**A/N: OMG I'm aliveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! *gets tomato in face, but calmly peels it off* I expected as much, seeing as I haven't updated in MONTHS and people want to see an ending. *gets eggs in face and sighs* At least now I can taste a raw omlette.  
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**Anyway, quick little rant and off you go to read this chapter! This summer has been hectic and lots of stuff happened, but here's what YOU need to know ;) I am planning/writing two Gakuen Alice songfics, because I freakin' LOVE that anime/manga! Also, I'm starting college tomorrow, and, since I'm posting this chapter before starting school (barely but still) my dreams of becoming a Veterinarian have not been defeated! KLIYH will definatly never go into hiatus officially, since I work on it on and off, and I'm hoping I'll finish it completely by next year (NO GUARANTEES) but worst case scenario I finish it in two years. (Because I suck at updating stuff _) The biggest new thing is that I'm working on an original story based on my Daily Challenges Drabble "Of Blood and Honor" and "It's Too Late". So, if I take long to post (which, I probably will *gets pelted with all kinds of things for a full minute, then spits out the stuff that got into her mouth*) it's because of that.  
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**Helga: OK OK Criminy! You keep them waiting for months. MONTHS! And you expect them to listen to all your life's story?  
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**Me: Not my /life's/ story per say, as much as my summer to now story...  
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***Helga cracks knuckles and walks over to me*  
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***Blank error screen appears*  
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**Arnold: Believe me, you don't want to see that...Remember that darkangel1326 doesn't own Hey Arnold or it's characters. Enjoy the chapter!  
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><p><strong>Keep Love In Your Heart<strong>

**Chapter 5: Long Gone and Moved On**

**Written by: darkangel1326  
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**Approved and Beta'd by: LycoRogue  
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**"Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like." - Lao Tzu**

He looked up at the electronic screens towering above his head. On there was a display of various states and countries in the world. He could go anywhere he chose, and leave these painful memories behind. It was one of the rare times a person literally had the world at their fingertips.

However, the power didn't faze Arnold. He didn't feel the giddiness an opportunity like this was supposed to bring. He didn't have a burst of excitement boil through him. All he knew was that his chance of happiness was gone and may never come back again.

He sighed and gathered his luggage. It was time to grow up and move on.

"So, where will we be going now, son?" Miles asked, in a tone to hopefully pick up his son's spirit.

Arnold looked up and tried to put some happiness in his voice. Even if it took all his strength to do so. "I'm not sure yet. I don't really want to go back to Seattle. I finished my internship there and was going to find a job in Hillwood, but, after…the accident, I know I can't stay there…" Arnold looked at his parents, as they nodded in agreement.

But, despite the decision of leaving, he had no direction and wasn't sure where he even wanted to go. _If you do not care where you want to go, does it really matter where you go to begin with?_A small voice in his mind told him.

Arnold had decided to leave Hillwood, his hometown, where all his friends were. And the place where he met…her. The one, the girl who changed his life, and whose life he also changed. The girl who was his soulmate, and the one that Fate ripped away from him, not once, but twice in his lifetime. Their memories were all around Hillwood, from Slausen's where they had the occasional date, to the park, where he had to say goodbye to her. No matter where he looked, or how much he tried to avoid it, her presence lived in Hillwood. Despite the fact that she no longer did.

In Medical School, Arnold learned of many different injuries he would have to treat as a doctor, one of which was referred to by his professor as a "clean break". The injury and this name were self-explanatory; basically, the bone was broken completely, it was not a part break, nor was it a half break, it was very simply split. His professor said that one of these was what all his students should hope for in the field. Since no bone pieces would cause further injury, it was a fairly easy injury to treat.

Lately, Arnold couldn't help but think back to this injury, and how it related to his current situation.

_That's what I need right now. A "clean break". Just get away from everything that hurts. Even if it means leaving everything I've ever known._

Of course, Miles and Stella wouldn't let Arnold go anywhere without them. They knew he was depressed. And they didn't want to risk him doing something dangerous and reckless because of it. Even if he was twenty-six and had his PhD, deep down, he was their baby who was miraculously born in San Lorenzo all those years ago. They still felt the need to protect him.

Arnold went back to the electronic screens that would decide his destiny. His next decision was crucial; one that could change his life forever. With a determined expression, he browsed his options once more until seeing the name of a state he never gave a second thought to. However, for some reason, his heart, which had grown more and more distant, gave a faintly bright beat.

"Mom! Dad!" Arnold called out to his parents. "I know where I want to go."

A few days had passed since Helga (and consequentially Erin) woke up in the hospital.

Despite this, Helga never told Erin who Arnold was. Every time Erin tried to bring up his name, Helga became quiet. It wasn't so much because she didn't want to tell Erin; it was because she found the attempt to be futile.

Helga, just as with Arnold at first, was having a hard time opening up.

_It's not that I don't trust her. It's more like I don't trust myself._

She knew if she talked about Arnold, thought about Arnold, or dreamt about Arnold, she would accidentally take control of Erin's body. One that wasn't hers to begin with.

While Helga was having these thoughts, Erin was enduring her last day in the hospital. In a few hours, her family would take her to her apartment and she'd get a few days off before going back to work.

_Just like always. After the operation, now that I'm "normal", they'll expect even more of me than before. And then, there's Livy…_

Erin let out another depressed sigh. The fourth one today. But, since she was in the room alone, no one heard her. At least, she thought no one did.

_Okay, spill it sister, who's Lizzy? _Erin heard a voice tell her. She looked up and scanned the room. No one was there.

_Where is that voice coming from? _Erin thought.

_Uh, hel-lo?! It's just me. You know. The girl whose heart is currently tucked under your ribcage, _answered Helga.

Erin sighed again. Helga certainly was a character. She had the kind of personality that wouldn't fit into her parents' standards for her. It was also the kind of person she most wanted to be like.

_Sorry, Helga. I've just got a lot of things going on right now, so I wasn't paying much attention, _Erin thought.

Erin heard Helga sigh. Although they could communicate easily with one another, they rarely spoke much. Both parties were too preoccupied in their own thoughts to pay attention to the other.

_So what's this I hear about 'parents expecting more from you' and who's Lizzy? _Helga asked.

Erin felt her eyes widen suddenly. Was she offering advice?

_Yes, I'm offering you advice._

_But why?_Erin thought, unable to connect the dots.

_Because…well, the least I can do while I'm still on Earth is help you, right? Besides, I can relate, _Helga said.

_You can?_

Helga stayed quiet for a moment, and then answered back. _I had a perfect older sister. She did everything right in her life. It was almost impossible to find a flaw. Naturally, my parents, like crazed bees around their prized honey, surrounded her with nothing less than complete love and affection. When I was born, my dad expected me to be better. Reach for the stars? That's what losers do. I was supposed to reach for the full damn Milky Way._

_Did you get there? _Erin asked, completely sucked in to Helga's tale.

Helga sighed. _Not in his eyes. No matter what I did, Olga did better than me by infinity. It was hard to compete with perfection, so I stopped trying._

Erin was silent for a moment. Until, Helga spoke up again.

_Anyway, who's Lizzy? A friend of yours? A pet?_

_Her name is Livy. She's my little sister. She's about to start High School next year._

_Is she rebellious?_

_Not at all!_

_Does she hide away from the family?_

_Not too much. She's usually pretty social with people._

_Is she an outcast in school?_

_No, she's actually quite popular._

_So…why exactly are you worried about her? She sounds like a younger version of my perfect sister._

_I'm worried she's trying to prove herself. Ever since I can remember, my parents wanted a first-rate child. When I came along, those were the expectations they gave me, and I tried my best. Ever since she could speak, my little sister has always looked up to me._

_So you're worried she is the way she is because of expectations for her?_

_I'm just worried she's trying to prove to my family-and me especially-that she is perfect._

_But…she does sound perfect._

_Yes, but recently whenever I want to talk to her, and spend some time with my sister…she avoids me. She gives me a lame excuse and walks off. I'm worried she resents me._

Helga sighed, remembering her situation with Olga quite well.

_I hate to be the bearer of bad news…but she probably does resent you a little bit._

Erin sighed, but continued to listen.

_This poor girl has to not only live up to your family's expectations, but she also has to stay away from your shadow._

_My shadow?_

_Yes. Don't you see? This chick has to make a name for herself. Since you're older, and have done more things, when people talk about your family, you are the first one that pops into their head. And your sister has to remain known as 'Erin's little sister'. _

_Livy has to make a name for herself, but be perfect. And that's tough on a kid. I think she's just starting to realize how annoying it can be, which is why she's kind of avoiding you._

_You think so?_

_I'm practically 100% positive that's why. It was like me and my sister. I was always in her shadow, and right when I became my own person…I die._

Helga sighed and there was a tense pause, but eventually, Erin broke it.

_What do you think I should do?_

_I'm not sure exactly. If I were Dr Bliss, I'd probably give you a logical answer. All I can tell you is to give her some space, and time. Maybe she just needs to think things through for a bit. I know I needed that when I was younger._

Another pause; until finally Erin asked what was on her mind.

_Do you think about your family much? _She ventured

_They're not the ones I worry about most, _Helga half-answered.

Erin blinked.

_What did Arnold do to make you love him above anything else? _Erin couldn't help but think.

Helga stopped talking after that point.

Arnold was once more boarded on a plane-10 years later-to leave his hometown, with his parents. The nostalgia kicked in.

He tried not to think about her, but couldn't stop himself. Like a distant bell, he heard her words ring through him.

"I-I never said goodbye to you."

Arnold closed his eyes.

_And you never will._

As much as he tried to forget her; her laugh, her smile, her voice, her appearance…the more the memories resurrected.

But he was tired of it all. Tired of fending away those painful truths, and those aching memories. Her voice, her memories…everything about her poured through Arnold's conscious, filling his soul with a desperate longing that would never be fulfilled. He held her voice in his mind, as a tiny reminder of why he had to leave, and didn't realize he overlooked a few things.

He overlooked Helga's true last words to him. He overlooked the fact that, once again, he was leaving Helga, with a broken heart, whereas he returned with a hopeful one. And, he overlooked the fact that, as his new destination drew closer, his heart was shining with a brighter intensity then it had for a very long time.

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><p><strong>AN: *DA1326 drags herself to screen, her left arm in a sling, her right leg in a cast, her head covered in bandages.***

**Maybe I'll start updating more often than /occasionally/.  
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***DA1326 pulls off disguise and smiles* Just kidding everyone! I'm fine! How about that for acting ;)  
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**Anyway, if you could please Review, that would be AWESOME SAUCE! And I'd love indefinately more :) **

**PWEASE! *Puppy dog eyes*  
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**~darkangel1326  
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**(you know, the perfectly mentally healthy writer!)  
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